Sunday, February 05, 2006

Family Affair

I woke up today with a nasty, nasty hangover which lasted until 6pm of today. It's actually an achievement; for the record, out of the countless drinking sprees, i now have a total of 2 puking sessions and 3 sessions of drunken bliss my whole life!

Last night was the celebration of a cousin's birthday and the usual sessions occurred. Normally, I sit quiet with the family; I am actually only close to iya and kuya roy. But last night was different and i have proven one thing about myself: i am indeed talkative under the unfluence of alcohol.

I was able to choke out sentences and found comfort amongst my family members who I once considered too far away from me. I was able to let out my heartache, my views, my cracked-up nothings.

And it felt good; I felt I belonged, cared for.

I realized another thing, however: under the evil, sinister influence of alcohol, cellphones and spiteful persons must be out of my reach. Last week, when I had a session with Josh and Alex, I texted someone and finally told him i loved him. It was actually hilarious...the most stupid thing I ever did in my entire 18 years of existence. The week that was, I wanted to bury myself in shame! But it ended good...it gave me more room to breathe.

Then last night, I had a semi-heated argument with Fhaye, who lectured me about getting drunk and telling my mom. We met at mass a while ago and cleared things up. As for her telling mom, though she will tell her what I was doing until 3:30 am of this morning, it would be of no use. Since 14, when mom and dad knows I'm with my older cousins, they have the idea of vodkas and beers carrying their teenage girl to oblivion.

And after everything, I'm seeing one mean girl, one nice contradiction to the faith I am professing, a blissful hypocrite.

~*~

I just love the word 'bliss.' I just do.

11:08 PM

-----*-----
I don't care what the world
throws at me now.
It's gonna be alright.
-----*-----

Tag!




God's creation.

Lee-an. YFC. 19. Writer. Poet. Student Nurse. Future Forensic Expert. Fascinated with corpses and mummies (haha ang morbid ba?) Loves Edgar Allan Poe too much she is obsessed with his works. Loves Philosophy. Loves ranting about Politics. Gawad Kalinga Advocate. 100% Pure...dare to be. Melancholic.

Likes

.Hillsong!
.YFC SB2
.Lacuna Coil
.After Forever
.Theatre of Tragedy
.Tristania
.Epica
.Apocalyptica
.Poetry
.Pesto Mantou
.Cadbury Dairy Milk
.Black and Purple
.CSI
.Grey's Anatomy
.One Tree Hill
.Korean!Korean!
.JOHNNY DEPP=HOTNESS
.Tim Burton=genius

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